Taking a back seat

I love being important to people...but who doesn't? I tend to find one really great friend and place him/her in the center of my world. For a period of time, that works. It is usually a person who is struggling for some reason, is in need of a devoted friend, or just has never experienced the type of bond I am able to form with people. Undoubtedly, the attention I give and the loyalty I show are easy to cling to during difficult times. However, once that difficult time passes or the newness of the friendship wears off...what happens to the dynamics of the relationship? I've had several friendships go through this. When I was younger, my fear of rejection automatically kicked in during the "transition" to what would be considered a more healthy and normal form of friendship. I would run the other direction or, the other extreme, hold on for dear life because I was afraid that if a friendship changed that meant it had to end. I am going through this transition right now and I see how much I have grown emotionally in my adulthood. My perspective has changed from--excuse my trite metaphor--being kicked out of the car to simply taking a back seat. The fact is that every friendship evolves. Our lives are in motion and things are bound to happen that change our situations. The sign of a true friendship is one that stands the test of time, one that can overcome any new factor that changes its dynamics. The people I have chosen to surround myself with are not so fickle that a major life event on their part would cause them to shut me out of their lives completely. There is just some shifting involved. At times that shifting is very subtle and at times it is more pronounced. Whatever the case may be, the back seat isn't such a bad place to be. Think about your back seat for a minute. It is the place where most people keep those things that are important and have to be within reach when needed...large things that cannot be shoved in the glove compartment, the console, that little change holder, or the ashtray. Some things are kept in the back seat for safety reasons. Others are stored there until a more appropriate location can be found. But, the point is that these things are not completely left out or completely forgotten. They may be back there for quite some time before you realize it, but they are eventually rediscovered. Over time, the same is true with any friendship that has taken a back seat. In the meantime, I will just sit here patiently and play with this trash you have on the floorboard and "The Club" you should be using so that your car doesn't get stolen. Oh look, there's a piece of candy......